Q&A - What is Inter-Dependency?

Published: September 15, 2021,  
Posted in: ,  

Today's question is what is inter-dependency? And is it healthy in a relationship?

Interdependency is considered healthy. Both partners have a solid sense of self.

They know how to self-regulate strong emotions. Possessing self-awareness, each partner is satisfied with the track of their own lives.

Bonding with another person that also has a solid sense of themselves, still requires the development of dependency over time. Intimate relationships require a vulnerability to depend on another in order to form a deeper bond of intimacy. 

Naturally this vulnerability or dependency requires that we continue to cultivate balance. Most of us struggle with maintaining that balance at some point in a long term relationship. Especially when major life choices such as parenting together or conjoining finances, we depend of each other. This dependency can feel overwhelming. Discussion of this issue within a long term relationship is advised to remain supportive. Its important to maintain individuality.

Interdependency is very different from codependency.

Codependency is an attempt to complete some aspect of oneself by joining with another person. It is futile to try to gain self-esteem by depending on another person to fill that void. This can lead to power struggles.

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