September 15, 2021

Q&A – What is Inter-Dependency?

Your Questions Answered

Today’s question is what is inter-dependency? And is it healthy in a relationship?

What is inter-dependency?

Interdependency is considered healthy. Both partners have a solid sense of self.

They have a good sense of self-regulation when it comes to strong emotions. In addition to self-awareness, each partner is satisfied with the track of their own life.

Bonding with another person that also has a solid sense of themselves still requires the development of dependency over time. Intimate relationships require a vulnerability to depend on one another in order to form a deeper bond of intimacy. 

Naturally, this vulnerability or dependency requires that we continue to cultivate balance. Most of us struggle with maintaining that balance at some point in a long-term relationship. Especially when major life choices such as parenting together or conjoining finances, we depend on each other. This dependency can feel overwhelming. A long-term relationship should discuss this issue in a supportive manner. It’s important to maintain individuality.

Interdependency is very different from codependency.

Codependency is an attempt to complete some aspect of oneself by joining with another person. It is futile to try to gain self-esteem by depending on another person to fill that void. This can lead to power struggles.

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